Many of those who follow JMC Ministries know that I have been struggling with afflictions to my body for 2 almost 3 years now.
I am diagnosed with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. In my past i have been beaten, raped, stocked, bullied, mentally emotionally physically and psychologically abused. I am plagued with flashbacks/night terrors during the night that I at times don't sleep for 5 days. I also have what is called Gastroparallisis which means that my stomach is damaged and whatever I eat does not digest properly. As the doctor described it My stomach is a washing machine that won't drain out the water. So my food sits longer in my stomach which in turn causes acids and bile to form and make me sick. I was diagnosed with Gastroparallisis after I had my gallbladder surgery. They said that due to the surgery some of the nerves in my stomach were damaged and now this is how my stomach is. I take medicine to help it but I will always have this problem and just have to be careful with what I eat, how much I eat, and when I eat.
Then in the past 9 months I started having these horrible painful sores come upon my body on my right side to be exact. I went to the doctor they put me on medicine and they went away. For 2 months, then came back and have now come back 4 times in the past 9 months. The most recent bout with these sores that I am dealing with right now is literally the worst they have EVER been. They are no longer just on my right side they have moved into both my armpits up both my arms, onto the left side of body, onto my right leg and even have popped up on my head. They are very painful and hurt to touch. The doctor believes it is either MRSA (a very serious form of Staph Infection) or another kind of bacteria that is reeking havoc on my body. I am on my 3rd round of antibiotics in 5 months and also have to wash with this extreme antibacterial soap that surgeons use when they are prepping for surgery to kill all the bacteria on their arms and hands.
My family and I have prayed anointed my head and body to be healed of all the afflictions that are upon me but nothing has changed. I continue to go to church, read my bible and keep my faith that God sees my suffering and hears my cries and will heal me.
Even when some people have told me that I must have done something wrong to be afflicted so. One person in a response to a prayer requests that I sent out about myself and how I have Night terrors and don't sleep for days on end because of it. Told me that I must not be reading my bible enough and not following God as closely as I should. That is NOT true, I love My Lord and Savior he has brought me out of some of the darkest most horrible situations. He has brought me this far and my faith has not wavered or faltered.
Last night while crying out in pain from these sores and the exhaustion from the night terrors and mental anguish I have been going through, I Cried to the Lord as I do daily and prayed. I then got out my bible and felt I needed to read the book of Job.
And this is why I call this blog entry "Alot Like Job
The 1st similarity I found to myself was after Job's family was killed Satan Came and afflicted him with Horrible Painful Sores all over his body. Alot like the sores that I have.
1 On another day the angels a]">[a] came to present themselves before the LORD, and Satan also came with them to present himself before him. 2 And the LORD said to Satan, "Where have you come from?"
Satan answered the LORD, "From roaming through the earth and going back and forth in it."
3 Then the LORD said to Satan, "Have you considered my servant Job? There is no one on earth like him; he is blameless and upright, a man who fears God and shuns evil. And he still maintains his integrity, though you incited me against him to ruin him without any reason."
4 "Skin for skin!" Satan replied. "A man will give all he has for his own life. 5 But stretch out your hand and strike his flesh and bones, and he will surely curse you to your face."
6 The LORD said to Satan, "Very well, then, he is in your hands; but you must spare his life."
7 So Satan went out from the presence of the LORD and afflicted Job with painful sores from the soles of his feet to the top of his head. 8 Then Job took a piece of broken pottery and scraped himself with it as he sat among the ashes.
The 2nd similarity is Job was plagued with Nightmares and terrifying visions just as I have nightmares or Night Terrors and I cannot find any comfort in sleep
13 When I think my bed will comfort me
and my couch will ease my complaint,
14 even then you frighten me with dreams
and terrify me with visions,
15 so that I prefer strangling and death,
rather than this body of mine.
After reading these scriptures and finding that Job had the same things happen to him that are happening to me and Job was a righteous man in God's sight and had done nothing wrong to deserve this other than God was out to prove to Satan that no matter what you may do to my child he will NOT Curse The Lord and will remain faithful through all the trials, afflictions and tribulations that Satan may throw his way.
Every person will be tested of their faith in God, I am like Job for I have never in all my suffering Cursed God and turned away from him. Because I know God is notdoing this to me it is Satan. Satan has hated me from the moment I was conceived in my mothers womb. He has used people time and time again to try and kill me, and openly persecute me in the church. But I have not lost faith. Satan has tormented my mind, my dreams, sometimes every waking moment to try and break me and to just give up. But, I have not and will not ever give up. For I know that God has a great plan for my life, otherwise Satan would not attack me in such an extreme manner to try and rid this world of me and the plan God has for my life.
But just like Job Satan only has the power we give to him. He may beat and scar this body of mine, but he will not beat and scar my soul and that is really what he is after. That which he will never gain. Because it belongs to God and only God.
If you are reading this please keep me in your prayers that I will be healed of these afflictions and be able to continue to do the work Jeremy and I have been doing through JMC Ministries.